Recent events made me realise how not being in Cambridge over the holiday period is such a sensible thing for my sanity. A common thread being uber-ignorant locals, the location in both cases being the John Lewis group a pure coincidence (albeit their shops seem to be a magnet for the type of irritating middle class people I’m going to cite).

* Waitrose for lunch, once tried..never to be repeated. The place is full of old people wandering round at a very slow place. The incidence of MeatTV watching (for some reason the meat area seems to attract people who just stand and gaze at shelves the way you’d watch TV looking a bit like the first time a child sees a live animal – how ironic !) was particularly high that day. Anyways, I was grabbing some ham at the deli counter and this old guy was in front of me. He had ordered some meat and the assistant asked him if he wanted the off cuts for free. The customer response surprised me. Rather than a simple yes/no, he deliberated for a long period of time (a bit like annoying people who take ages to order food at restaurants where I am usually thinking “it’s going to come out the other end in <24hrs just hurry up an make a decision") and then replied "go on then". I was thinking "what an ass, he's offering you something for free and you make it out as if you are doing him a favour and you don't even thank him for it". The scene still irritates me, I'm getting old I know but I did think "starving people in the world and this guy doesn't even appreciate free food". * John Lewis buying batteries. This time it wasn't a customer irritating me, instead the staff. Broadly anywhere in the world (save for some Central European countries) if you are stocking shelves and a customer comes along the assistant gets out of the way. Not in Cambridge! Instead they deliberately continue with what they are doing totally oblivious to the real world. I think it's something to do with their lack of spatial awareness due to living in a small place. Even after an "excuse me" the assistant didn't move. I was irritated and left without buying anything.